The Fullness of Who We Are
How often do we
behave in ways that satisfy the expectations of others? As we grow up, we are
asked to please others by changing our behavior. In doing so we receive their
approval. Yet we falsely believe that this approval is a sign of love. If they truly
loved us they would not ask us to change who we are to please them.
This can be a
tricky place, because by pleasing others we may distance ourselves from the
truth of who we are. In doing so we trade our authenticity for their
acceptance. Is the acceptance of others more important than our acceptance for
ourselves?
Each day we have
a new opportunity to live by the truth of who we are. Yet this may cause some
uncertainty within us. One reason may be because we don’t have the confidence
to travel this path alone. It is here where we begin to seek the guidance of
those around us. Their advice may be true for them, but it may not be true for
us.
If we are
feeling weak emotionally their guidance may bring us comfort, although it may
cause us to abandon our dreams. How will that make us feel when we arrive at a
point in life and realize we lived to fulfill the expectations of others?
Much is written
about living a life without regret. Is that possible if we live to fulfill the
expectations of others? What about the expectations we had when we were younger
about the life we wanted to live? The places we wanted to visit? Or the things
we wanted to accomplish? Will we regret doing these things? Do we regret them
now?
To shift our
lives away from living by the expectations of others, we first have to come to
a place where we accept our responsibility for the way our life will turn out. We
have to realize that to be true to ourselves, we will be making decisions based
on what we feel is true and right for us. In doing so, we accept that the
opinions of others may be not relevant to the life we want to live.
We may get to a
point where we are unsure which way to go, and the opinion of close friend may shed some light on our
choices, but ultimately the choice will be ours. This is where we have to
become comfortable with our choices, although this is how we learn to trust
ourselves to make the right choices.
If we choose a
direction that ends poorly, then it is best to search for the positive lesson
in the experience. A poor choice may also reveal an emotional pattern we have
carried with us throughout life. Did we make a choice based on these patterns?
Are we courageous enough to examine the patterns and uncover the root reason
for our behavior? If we do this inner work honestly, we may learn a valuable lesson we may not have understood
if we lived a life fulfilling the expectations of others.
It takes courage
to follow what we know to be true and right for us. What are the options,
living in fear because we don’t know if we will fail? If we focus on failure
then failure will happen. We always have two basic choices. One choice leads us
down a path to a life that is unsatisfying, dull, and boring. While the other
will guide us to a life full of unexpected wonders.
Yes there may be
challenges and struggles, although if we keep an open heart, and stay true to
ourselves, we will have the strength to move past these difficulties to a life
we once thought was out of our reach.
When we look at
the foundation of being true to ourselves, we will discover this foundation is
rooted in love. It is a source of love that has no beginning, nor will it ever
end. This is the root of our self-love.
To live to the
fullness of who we are meant to be is to live a life comforted by this powerful
source of love. When we choose to set aside the expectations of others, and
live to the fullness of who we are, we are choosing to love ourselves. It is
this love that gives us the strength to wake up each and every day and makes
the choices that are true and right for us.
~~~
Can we set aside
the expectations of others and live to the fullness of who we are?
Let me know what
you think, I’m always open to exploring the subject further. Leave a comment or
question below, or email me at paulhudonauthor@gmail.com.
Each week I
email an article to those who have subscribed to my weekly. This week I wrote
about stopping self-judgement. Here is an excerpt.
When we say we
should be doing better, what we are really saying is we are not good enough.
Not good enough for who? Some person a thousand miles away we follow on social
media, telling us how we should live? Who cares what that person thinks, all
that matters is what we think of ourselves.
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If you would like to purchase a
copy of my book, “Your Inner Guidance, The Path to Discovering Your True
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I’m fortunate to write a monthly
column for two online magazines. In
Conscious Shift Magazine you can find my article, “All The Difference”
https://consciousshiftcommunity.com/all-the-difference/
This month in New Spirit Journal
you’ll find my article titled, “Opportunity.”
https://www.newspiritjournalonline.com/opportunity/
It is with much appreciation I have
to thank the Publisher of New Spirit Journal, Krysta Gibson for giving me the
opportunity to write for such an inspiring magazine. Krysta has been publishing
in one form or another for over thirty-five years, and has decided to take a
break and see what new opportunities life has to offer. I wish her and those
she loves, the best in the years ahead. Thank you Krysta, for sharing the
wisdom of my inner voice.
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Thank you for being a part of this wonderful adventure called
life. I appreciate your support.
Peace and Well-Being
Copyright Paul Hudon 2021
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